Came partial circle. For past ten years letters have been archived in a plastic bag. Recently free computer. Now, it's quite beneficial, SRO Hotel LA is too close quarters to typewrite.. A place to look at my scratch in print as if from another. A place to be spontaneous. Opposed to wasting creativity writing laborious unrequited love letters to girls on dating site.. A space for unedited spill and archive. Thoughts, corridors, catacombs, square statements, scraps of memory, quotes, poems, attempts at prose, screaming notes in search of God, surely a drunken log.. Mostly for my own experimentation but go ahead.. If lost or abandoned will just make more, will break apart one day anyways, will not matter anymore then, these old moons and pale worn yellow dreams.. The skies will finally have exhausted. It will be exquisite..
I’m watching a documentary about the building of One World Trade Center in New York. I get to thinking that if people are willing to go to such unimaginably fucking laborious feats to build a tower of world commerce (or whatever they do there), cant they put equally that much effort into restoring the very world environment they are haphazardly destroying?
The reason why. Because only the tower can make money. That non potable nutrient-less paper they love.
Nothing is new now. No Arts will be new. New technology will be new in the sense that instead of being invented to mass produce it will be invented to clean up what mass production has ruined. The only thing new will be downsizing. It will be new to say “No”. It will be new to stop doing things. It will be new to suppress romance. It is over, the artistic climate is Icee because humans have wrecked the earth. The pure rules of Karma dictate the suppression of any extravagance. There will be blockbusters about the apocalypse and books, but those will be the last creative endeavors prior to the calm before the storm.
Drunks are always Prophetic..
I think the reason why my fellow americans look so pathetic and foolish is because they are choosing to remain sheep like in a time when they need to be educating themselves and taking critical action to correct the imbalances and pollutants which plague their environments and society.
I can surely say that these glowing tablet screens are much to blame. People can either use media to learn or to be entertained, and we all know how americans like to get down. Glowing screens lull them into a state of mindlessness . If you looked at the brain activity of a middle aged human watching a TV show it would probably be the equivalent of an infant sucking its mothers breasts and twirling her hair.
Things are fixing to get very fast and ugly.
I think it feels much the same as the French Revolution must have felt like. But this time the poor are too busy watching people falling down stairs on Youtube.
No Revolution this Time:(
The more you fight against the tragic feeling and nature of life, the stronger it grows in you. It will not be ignored. It is beautiful and surreal when digested properly. It can even feel blissful. Life is like a Drug. In the beginning it is beautiful and dreamy, a youthful optimism which fades. As you age, the world reconfigures itself as a colder, more serious landscape. Tragic and beautiful, diamond like when you see the miracle of existence and think one day you will have to lose it all.
I think life is just a fluctuating rollercoaster of human emotion and discovery. A varying sensation from minute to minute. Added to or subtracted from by the many choices you make. Someday it will break into a vivid dreamlike eternity of unimaginable scope and ecstasy. Or not. But it will end. Its ending all over the place.
I feel guilty for writing all this.
I think you were just lonely God, so you created a lifeforce which can and surely will love you back. As I have known loneliness you too must have known it tenfold. I’m glad I’m alive but sometimes the world is just too fucked up. I hope all those who have suffered did not suffer in vain.
You created the world like humans adopt cats. Its all relative. Everything needs love. Even you God. Psychologists say a time comes when a child sees their father as weak, or something like that. I see you as human.